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25 December 2009

Merry Christmas to all!

A retelling of the 19th-century story, especially for aviators. This has been floating around the Internet for years in various forms — and probably was passed around as photocopies for years before that.

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and out on the ramp,
Not an airplane was stirring, not even a Champ.
The aircraft were fastened to tie downs with care,
In hopes that — come morning — they all would be there.

The fuel trucks were nestled, all snug in their spots,
With gusts from two-forty at 39 knots.
I slumped at the fuel desk, now finally caught up,
And settled down comfortably, resting my butt.

When the radio lit up with noise and with chatter,
I turned up the scanner to see what was the matter.
A voice clearly heard over static and snow,
Called for clearance to land at the airport below.

He barked his transmission so lively and quick,
I’d have sworn that the call sign he used was “St. Nick.”
I ran to the panel to turn up the lights,
The better to welcome this magical flight.

He called his position, no room for denial,
“St. Nicholas One, turnin’ left onto final.”
And what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a Rutan-built sleigh, with eight Rotax Reindeer!

With vectors to final, down the glideslope he came,
As he passed all fixes, he called them by name:
“Now Ringo! Now Tolga! Now Trini and Bacun!
On Comet! On Cupid!” What pills was he takin’?

While controllers were sittin’, and scratchin’ their heads,
They phoned to my office, and I heard it with dread,
The message they left was both urgent and dour:
“When Santa pulls in, have him please call the tower.”

He landed like silk, with the sled runners sparking,
Then I heard, “Left at Charlie,” and “Taxi to parking.”
He slowed to a taxi, turned off of three-oh,
And stopped on the ramp with a “Ho, ho-ho-ho…”

He stepped out of the sleigh, but before he could talk,
I ran out to meet him with my best set of chocks.
His red helmet and goggles were covered with frost,
And his beard was all blackened from Reindeer exhaust.

His breath smelled like peppermint, gone slightly stale,
And he puffed on a pipe, but he didn’t inhale.
His cheeks were all rosy and jiggled like jelly,
His boots were as black as a cropduster’s belly.

He was chubby and plump, in his suit of bright red,
And he asked me to “fill it, with hundred low-lead.”
He came dashing in from the snow-covered pump,
I knew he was anxious for drainin’ the sump.

I spoke not a word, but went straight to my work,
And I filled up the sleigh, but I spilled like a jerk.
He came out of the restroom, and sighed in relief,
Then he picked up a phone for a Flight Service brief.

And I thought as he silently scribed in his log,
These reindeer could land in an eighth-mile fog.
He completed his pre-flight, from the front to the rear,
Then he put on his headset, and I heard him yell, “Clear!”

And laying a finger on his push-to-talk,
He called up the tower for clearance and squawk.
“Take taxiway Charlie, the southbound direction,
Turn right three-two-zero at pilot’s discretion”

He sped down the runway, the best of the best,
“Your traffic’s a Grumman, inbound from the west.”
Then I heard him proclaim, as he climbed thru the night,
“Merry Christmas to all! I have traffic in sight.”

Thanks to AVweb: The Night Before Christmas – Aviation Style

18 December 2009

Grounded

The wind is 22 gusting 30. I am sitting indoors, watching flight videos and reading accident reports. GA pilots go through accident reports like they are candy. We experience vicariously the scenarios that we desperately hope will never actually happen to us and what better time than when we are stuck on the ground anyway?

Brief Break in the RainIt’s the same every winter – my eyes start darting from the calendar to my log book to the calendar again as I edge towards becoming out of date. The weather and Christmas sloth combine to make flying seem like a chore. I can never get excited about circuits for the sake of circuits. I’d love to go somewhere; however travelling becomes riskier with the variable weather, the likelihood of getting stranded becomes higher. Every December, my desire to get into the plane hits an annual low.

It’s easy to focus on the negatives. I do the same when it comes to skiing. When I’m home, I think about the cold and the bruises on my shoulders from carrying the skis and the way the boots cut into my shins and the sore muscles and the wet gloves. But I know that when I’m up there, coming down the crystal white mountain, feeling the ground slide beneath me, making my way down the slope, it’ll all come back to me: this is why I do this. It’s a physical rush.

Flying doesn’t have quite the same effect or at least, not if everything goes to plan. I’m pleased if it is all goes as expected but I’m not breathless. I may gasp a bit if things go wrong, but the ball in the pit of my stomach while I try to sort it out is not a feeling I can claim to enjoy.

And so now, sitting safe and warm at the computer, I find it hard to get excited because I’m thinking about planning, not flying. I don’t want to get out the maps and get to the airport early and check the plane and beg ATC to fit me in between all the jet airliners. I can’t think of anywhere I want to go. It feels like hard work.

I go to the airfield anyway and sit in the coffee shop, listening to other grounded pilots. I’m hoping for a reminder of why I love flying, why I spend so much time and money and effort into this hobby. I want to be up there, conquering the sky, a young man says, gazing out the window with undisguised yearning. I have to hide my confusion. There is no such colonialist desire in my heart, I have no visions of conquest. But then I think about his words again and realise that I’m wrong. It’s not the sky that I want to subdue, it is myself.

I want to have flown more than I want to fly. I want to have survived another trip, I want to learn another trick, I want another story to tell. I want to conquer my own inexperience and ineptitude.

That young man might fly because he yearns for the freedom of flight but that isn’t what drives me.

I fly to land.

Every time I successfully land the plane I feel an adrenaline rush that it would take class A drugs to recreate. The first time, I was shaking as I got out of the plane but the victory was undeniable: I flew this plane and I brought it to the ground. I navigated and interacted and then touched the flying beast onto a specific runway at a specific point (sometimes even gently).

I fly to prove I can, over and over again.

What is it that draws you to flight? And was it always that way?

11 December 2009

Drunk steals plane at airshow

I had to cover my eyes to watch this video the first time I was shown it. But then I kept peeking through my fingers.

Totally amazing. It’s hard for me to imagine ever having the skill required to appear to fly that badly. It’s awesome. He’s got incredible control.

The pilot is Kyle Franklin from Franklin’s Flying Circus & Airshow. He is married to the beautiful Amanda Younkin, who manages Franklin’s Flying Circus and Younkin Airshows. Kyle and Bobby Younkin are the pilots – although Amanda can fly as well. When she was featured in the 2010 Bombshell calendar, she was the only babe to fly the planes as well as pose in front of them.

(Hey, another great gift idea! You can buy the calendar online at My Bombshells)

A high resolution copy of film can be downloaded from their website along with a dozen other clips of the circus in action at Franklin’s Flying Circus Video Page. This particular clip is the one marked as “Comedy Act Video Download” and worth watching full-screen on the biggest monitor you can find.

The website also includes details of Jimmy Franklin and Bobby Younkin, who tragically crashed at the Saskatchewan Centennial Air Show in 2005. Their air show team, Masters of Disaster was one of the most sought after in the industry at the time of the accident.

I enjoyed reading the short essays but was especially entranced by the descriptions of Kyle Franklin growing up with airshows as a standard backdrop of his childhood:

Kyle grew up living in a hangar-house in Ruidoso, NM. The hangar soon became his favorite playground as well as a place where he and his father shared quality time servicing Waco’s, Super Cubs, and the Aerostar. Kyle’s first airplane ride was four weeks after his birth. Father Jimmy taught him how to fly when he was eight years old and later taught him aerobatics. As a toddler, Kyle seized every opportunity to wing-walk in Dad’s Waco Mystery Ship as it taxied on about on the ground at air shows. Kyle took his first airborne wing-walk at age 14, and just three years later he was wing-walking professionally at age 17.

I am definitely hoping to see more of Kyle, Bobby and Amanda and Franklin’s Flying Circus & Airshow.

10 December 2009

The Ninth Day: A Gift Guide

A number of aviation bloggers have joined up to bring you The Twelve Days of Christmas: An Aviation Gift Guide. I’m going out on a limb with today’s recommendation but it can be hard to be sure what a pilot might like – we’re all different – and this was the one thing I could think of that every pilot would use.

OK, I admit, this is a gift you probably should have started saving up for last year. It’s cheaper than a Cirrus and more expensive than just about every other aviation gift you are likely to find recommended. But maybe you can get everyone in the family to chip in?

The Bose Aviation Headset X is a lightweight, noise-cancelling portable headset which I’ve found to be both comfortable and reliable. You can spot the pilots who have these at any training school, they carry their headset with them, refusing to use the set provided in the rental planes.

You can buy the headset online from Bose via Amazon.com for $995 in the US. In the UK, you’ll have to find the nearest shop using the Bose Dealer Locator.

Yes, it costs almost a thousand dollars. This is a big-ticket item, make no mistake. However, if you can get the cash together and you want to really surprise your favourite pilot, then take a look at this headset. I’m confident that every aviator would be very happy to find this in their stocking.

But if this isn’t what you had in mind, don’t despair! There is a a great collection of ideas in the the Aviation Gift Guide and more to come! I’ve listed the gift ideas so far and you can check the guide again over the next few days to see what other pilots came up with.

Day One: A Cirrus

Day Two: Flyabout DVD

Day Three: Intrument Coasters

Day Four: Breitling Navitimer

Day Five: Portable Collision Avoidance System

Day Six: Discovery Flight

Day Seven: Safer Pilots

Day Eight: Learn Your GPS

4 December 2009

Video from Airventure 2009

This is an awesome video taken at EAA AirVenture Oshkosh – The World’s Greatest Aviation Celebration by Slick Aviation, a college student who shot 6 hours of video over the ten days he spent at Airventure and cut it down to the best 5 minutes.

I couldn’t help but grin at his blogpost about the unexpected popularity of his video.
Video…only a tad more popular than I thought…

***UPDATE***At the time of writing this I have just received a youtube honor…something that’s fairly close to impossible unless it was shown on TV, someone gets hurt, or it’s a music video. This week, thanks to everyone viewing the new Airventure video, it ranked #83 of the top 100 viewed videos for youtube. That mean, out of every video viewed on youtube, the new Airventure video is #83. Thanks again for everyone who watched!

It’s been five days since I’ve uploaded the Airventure 2009 review video, and the view count…ratings…and comments are off the charts. It has exceeded expectations twenty fold! At the time of writing it has 21,633 views. THAT IS INSANE! I was not expecting anything more than maybe 1,200 views…maybe. To quote my father, “It just keeps feeding itself.”

As of today, the video is up to 658,636 views and has a 5-star rating. It really does deserve it, Slick has put a huge amount of effort into editing this video and it is honestly one of best I’ve seen come out of Airventure this year – including professional clips.

You can also read about his adventures at the airshow in a day-by-day review he posted to the EAA Airventure 2009 Post Review – ARC Air Discussion Forums. He took 1,400 photographs in addition to the video footage and included some of the best ones in his review.

The next Airventure will be July 26 – August 1 in 2010 and after seeing Slick Aviation’s video and photographs, I’m tempted to try to plan a trip to Oshkosh next summer.

3 December 2009

On the Third Day of Christmas…

Trying to find presents is never easy and however much I swear I will be more organised next year, it always seems to end up December before I’m ready.

This year, a number of aviation bloggers have teamed up to bring you gift ideas and I’m thrilled to be one of them. With a theme of “The Twelve Days of Christmas,” we’ll each be posting gift ideas for the aviator in your life.

Day One:
On the first day of Christmas… I wish me a Cirrus | Plastic Pilot

Day Two:
Max Trescott Aviation Trends Aloft: Twelve Days of Christmas – FlyAbout DVD movie for Aviation Lovers

Day Three:

Aviation coasters!

Seriously, it can be nerve-wracking to buy gifts for pilots when you don’t know what is missing from their flight bag but these coasters are useful in any household and they look great!

I am sure they will bring a smile to the face of anyone interested in planes.

I found them for sale over at Trintec Industries Inc.. They have three different styles – classic, round and modern – as well as a number of other fun household products in their aviation catalog. They accept Paypal for payment and will ship anywhere in the world.

Stay tuned for Day Four from Matthew Stibbe at Golf Hotel Whiskey.